My Neko, My Maid
by Emotive Gothika
Summary: Kyouya is a neko! Kyouya is a maid! Tsuna loves both! Two 2718 short stories. Happy Birthday Kyouya!


**A/N:** Another year gone, another birthday has come. Happy birthday my dear skylark! Many happy returns! Please don't bite me to death! You have Tsuna for that!

LOL, anyway, I originally wanted to post the sequel to Lick It but I didn't finish it on time... So instead, I decided to take a few themes and incorporate 2718 into it. But time was of the essence and despite all the ideas in my mind, I was only able to crank out two stories in two days (damn my fickle fingers!). Despite that, I hope you love reading them all the same. Kyouya... not so much... *dodges tonfas* HA! *caught by chains and handcuffs* Oh crap...

**Warning/s:** Slash (yay!), OOCs (double yay!), crossdressing (triple yay!) (*tonfa'd*) (oww...)

**Disclaimer:** No, I don't own KHR because if I did we would have seen a half-nekkid Kyouya waaaaaaay sooner in the series instead of waiting for the OVA. XDDD (*nearly squeezed to death*) DDDX

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><p><strong>My Neko<strong>

It was early morning, the time when the sun was just peeking out over the horizon and casting an orange splash against the largely purple sky. The city of Namimori was as quiet as a city could get at this time in the day, with its early risers opening their eyes to a new day and getting ready for whatever work that must be done.

Sawada Tsunayoshi was not one of those early risers. He had the excuse that work doesn't start until nine for him, but he really never was a morning person, though he could fool anyone because he had a perpetual cheerful demeanor despite his aversion to waking up.

On the other hand, or in this case paw, Tsuna (as he preferred to be called) had a pet cat-person who was a very early morning riser. Hibari Kyouya (as he was named by his owner) had the excuse of being able to sleep at any time of the day but really the only reason Kyouya woke up early in the mornings was to wake up his owner himself. It was a source of amusement for the cat-person and yes, he is very sadistic as Tsuna had learned while raising the feline-humanoid.

Kyouya sat on his heels on the edge of Tsuna's bed, still clad in his black pajamas and his tail swaying gently behind him as his ears twitched upon his head at every sound it caught. Kyouya was a black cat and despite the trouble he caused for his owner sometimes he wasn't bad luck at all. He was a rather beautiful specimen of his species with sleek black fur and hair, fair skin that looked like it had been touched by moonlight, and enticing narrow eyes that were a curious mix of blue and grey. He was lithe and flexible and had a rather feminine body, but he was a fierce cat when in a fight. Tsuna should know.

Anyway, Kyouya sat there on the bed, watching his owner sleep soundly. He wouldn't admit it, but he loved to watch Tsuna sleep. There was just a peaceful expression on the human's face that made butterflies erupt in the feline's stomach. When Tsuna was awake and not sporting any negative emotions, he was just so happy and cheerful that it seemed almost naïve even though he was far from it. At times the expression irritated Kyouya to pieces, but he secretly loved the easy smile that appears on his owner's face and the forgiving nature the human sported. It was just so endearing.

But here, lying on his bed in the throes of unconsciousness, Tsuna looked nearly angelic. His skin was fair, though darker than Kyouya's; his hair was a light brown and naturally spiky; his eyes, when open, were a soft caramel brown that were so kind and gentle that it seemed impossible to show anger (though Kyouya had seen it show more then that); he had a nice lean physique and he was also tall, which is a far cry from his short days when he was a kid. All in all, Tsuna was a very handsome and a great catch of a man. Not that Kyouya was looking for one… yet…

Kyouya's ears twitched forward when Tsuna mumbled in his sleep and shifted his head. The human's pink mouth was slightly open (and looked very kissable) and blue-grey eyes watched closely as his bare (and very delectable) chest rose and fell with each breath. A splatter of pink appeared across Kyouya's cheeks and nose when he noticed that he was actually ogling his owner. He wildly shook his head at that, as if the action would cause the impure thoughts to fly out of his ears. That was not the proper way to think about his owner.

Getting back to the original reason why he was sitting on Tsuna's bed, Kyouya carefully crawled over to the human and straddled his hips. Tsuna grunted a little once the cat-person's weight was on him, but aside from that he showed no sign of waking. With a mischievous smirk, Kyouya leaned forward and licked his owner on the cheek. Again, Tsuna mumbled but showed no signs of waking.

Not one to give up so easily, especially when it came to his owner, Kyouya licked Tsuna's cheek again and then nipped his owner's ear, whispering, "Wake up, Tsunayoshi". Tsuna, being the deep sleeper he was, mumbled a sentence that suspiciously sounded like, "But I don't wanna, Okaasan…" and Kyouya gave him an incredulous look before he shifted into a sitting position and extended his claws with a smirk.

If at first you don't succeed, bring out the claws. That was Kyouya's motto.

Unfortunately, due to Kyouya's shifting about, Tsuna's eyelids fluttered open. Kyouya froze at the sight, looking panicked. He was never caught when trying to wake up his owner and since this was the first time, he didn't know what to do. He just sat there, watching as Tsuna opened his bleary, sleep-laden eyes and looked at Kyouya. To the cat's surprise however, Tsuna smiled at the sight of him.

"Kyouya," the human said groggily. "Tadaima…"

The incredulous look was back on Kyouya's face. Was Tsuna dreaming while awake?

Kyouya nearly jerked back when Tsuna suddenly sat up, but he stilled when those large hands, that have petted him time and again over the course of his life, reached out to hold his face. His cheeks blushed pink once again when he felt those hands caress his skin. He had been petted numerous times, but his skin has never been caressed by his owner. It felt... nice. And Kyouya's body shivered at the sensation of those calloused fingertips running up and down his cheek.

"Kyouya…" Tsuna said, still rather groggy. "I missed you…"

Then he did something that shocked his pet to the bone. He leaned forward and planted his lips right on Kyouya's own pair. Said cat-person was so shocked his eyes went impossibly wide and his body froze, unmoving even when Tsuna removed himself from the feline and fell back onto his pillows, fast asleep once again.

It took a moment or two for Kyouya to register what had just happened. He blinked rapidly then looked down at his owner who was softly snoring away the early morning. He stared at the human for a few seconds before anger started to flood his being. Gnashing his teeth, Kyouya extended his claws again and loomed over his owner, his blue-grey eyes flashing menacingly.

On the street outside the house, an early morning jogger jumped in surprise when he heard a pained screech. He looked around wildly, looking for where the sound had come from, but when he saw nothing he warily continued on his morning jog.

Back inside the house, a wide awake Tsuna was gingerly fingering the fresh scratch marks on his face. "Kyouya, why did you do that!" he exclaimed at his cat who was just walking away from his bed.

Kyouya just turned to glare at him, but since he was slightly pink in the face it looked more like a pout. Tsuna gaped at Kyouya, who huffed irritatingly and stomped out of the room, his bristling tail in the air.

He missed the small smile that appeared on Tsuna's face.

Kyouya wasn't the only one who can be a little mischievous.

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><p><strong>My Maid<strong>

The Arcobaleno Café is a popular butler café in Namimori. Not only does it have delicious food, a relaxing atmosphere, and incredibly handsome men to serve the customers, but it was gay friendly as well (much to the delight of yaoi fangirls everywhere). And it was a good thing that it was gay friendly because the owner, a man who went by the name Reborn, decided that the butler café was going to be turned into a maid café for the week.

This was met with mixed reactions by the employees, most notably the servers. Mukuro, Byakuran, and Kikyo were notably excited about the chance of being a maid. Enma and Aoba were more reluctant; Enma because he was incredibly shy as it is and Aoba kept pointing out that they were men and men must hold onto their manly status (after which someone else would point out that he was the only straight guy that worked there and everyone else was as gay as a maypole, so to speak). Kyouya, the most stoic and mysterious of the workers would only say that work is work and if that involved crossdressing then he was going to do it no matter what.

In the end everyone had to wear the maid outfits (sans the three chefs, Colonello, Lampo, and Lussuria, lucky bastards, though Lussuria was notably disappointed, seeing as he was the gayest of them all), mostly because Reborn would kick and fire their asses on the spot if they didn't agree. When Monday came rolling about, the four servers who worked there full-time stepped into their tailor-made costumes (courtesy of Reborn), put on their wigs and make up and they got to work. When late Tuesday afternoon came about, the last two servers punched in their cards and got to work as well.

And apparently they were a hit. Despite Aoba's exclamations of them being manly men, they looked like beautiful young women in their outfits and their intake of customers doubled over the week. Each of their maid costumes was tweaked to their unique tastes and even color-coordinated, but they had the relatively same style of the traditional French maid. Even Reborn got in on the action, though instead of a maid he was dressed in an elegant gown and played mistress of the house. He was less androgynous than the others though, but still beautiful.

Soon Saturday came along and the week was coming to a close (the café was closed on Sundays). Enma and Kyouya, who were the two part-timers, were in the break room, resting their aching feet (how do women walked in high heels?) when Mukuro entered, a sly smirk on his face. Kyouya narrowed his eyes at the other man, already suspicious. They don't get along very well, but they tried to keep their fights to the minimum once at work. Outside of work however was another story.

"Hibari-kun," the indigo-haired man sang as he sidled up to the glaring raven-haired man. Enma watched them nervously, his wide eyes flitting from one to the other as he perched at the edge of his chair, ready to bolt out of there at the first sign of trouble.

"What is it, Rokudo?" Kyouya asked through gritted teeth. He hated it when the man talked to him. It was like Mukuro was playing mind games with him and Kyouya did not like to play mind games.

"You have a special customer outside," Mukuro sang back to him. "I know you've been missing him all week, but he's here and asking for you now."

Both Enma's and Kyouya's eyes went wide at those words. There was only one person who would ask specifically for Kyouya when he was on a break and the whole staff knew who he was. Without even sparing a glare towards Mukuro, Kyouya rose from his seat and strolled out of the break room. Chuckling, Mukuro followed him and, not wanting to be alone or to miss the show, Enma brought up the rear.

There were only a few customers in the café now, but sitting at a table near the window were three handsome men who were talking and laughing together. The servers, the chefs, and Reborn watched from behind the counter as Kyouya calmly sauntered up to their table, though they shared a secret laugh when they noticed Kyouya was nervously straightening his wig and skirt and he stumbled a tiny bit with the heels he had on. They all knew about the café romance that was happening to Kyouya, even though the man himself would deny it. It was sweet (even to Aoba) and they would pay front rows seats to witness everything that would happen.

Once Kyouya approached the table, he bowed and said, "Okaeri nasaimasen, goshujin-sama," in that deep, melodic voice of his. He was unable to make his voice sound even remotely feminine (Enma was the expert in that field) but he was as beautiful as the rest of them. The wig he wore that day, which was the exact shade of black as his hair, sported royal curls that fell over his shoulders and down his back. His maid outfit had purple mixed in with the white and black, making him look rather regal, and his face had only a light amount of make-up because he was already such a natural beauty (as said by Kikyo, their resident make-up artist). All in all, if it wasn't obvious that he was cosplaying as a maid, he would've been a princess instead.

Two men at the table, one tall and tanned with a friendly face while the other looked foreign with silver hair and sea-green eyes, gaped at Kyouya. The tall brunet laughed and said something about how beautiful their server was, but Kyouya had no interest in what he said. His eyes were on the third man at the table, the one who had patiently been courting him for months in and outside of the café.

He was tall, taller than Kyouya and his silver-haired friend, but still a few inches shy of the other brunet, and his physique was lean with narrow shoulders. He had a friendly, rather rounded face with caramel brown eyes and he sported a crown of light brown hair that seemed to defy gravity with its spiky nature though Kyouya knew for a fact that it was natural and no amount of hair gel can tame it.

The man's name was Sawada Tsunayoshi and he had stolen Kyouya's heart (loathe he was to admit it).

"Konnichiwa Kyouya," Tsuna said, smiling brightly at the dress-clad server. His voice wasn't as deep as Kyouya's, but it was soft and comforting and it made shivers travel up Kyouya's spine.

"Tsunayoshi," Kyouya replied smoothly, his face not entirely devoid of expression. In fact, his eyes seemed to be smiling at the spiky-haired brunet, something that went completely over the heads of Tsuna's two friends.

"Man, too bad we went on that trip to France or we could've been here all week!" the tall brunet laughed, causing the silver-haired man to scowl at him.

"Yakyuu-baka, that trip was mandatory!" he exclaimed, seemingly irritated by his friend's easy going nature. "Going to a crossdressing café is _not_ more important then our grades!"

"Aw, but I barely understood what anyone was saying! French is so difficult to learn."

"You idiot…"

"Don't mind them," Tsuna said, tearing Kyouya's attention away from the two. "Takeshi-kun and Hayato-kun have these regularly; it's their way of showing affection for each other. Cute isn't it?"

Giving the taller man an incredulous look, Kyouya nodded slightly then took out his pen and pad paper to jot down their orders. Once he had them, he turned away from the table, but not without a parting gift from Tsuna in the form of some light hand-holding.

In the kitchen, where the employees and Reborn had congregated, Byakuran, Mukuro, and Lussuria were busy teasing Kyouya while the others (sans Colonello and Lampo, who were busy making the orders) watched from a safe distance.

"Aw look! He's blushing!" Mukuro cooed, poking Kyouya on the cheek where it was certainly slightly pink.

"This is just like in romance novels and Shoujo manga!" Lussuria gushed, wiggling his hips and clutching his face. "It's so romantic!"

"Ne, Hibari-kun, have you and your man gone on a date already?" Byakuran chuckled, joining Mukuro in poking the silent server only on the opposite cheek. "Or have you bypassed that and went straight to bed? Is he better then great, like I thought?"

Those who were standing by and watching with interest silently counted down in their minds. Right at the mark, there was the sound of breaking dishes and Lussuria squealing in distress as Kyouya attacked the three men with anything he can get his hands on. Surprisingly, Reborn was standing at his side, handing him knives, forks, and other sharp objects. Seeing the disbelieving looks that were shot his way by his other employees, Reborn only shrugged indifferently and offered no explanation.

Once he was satisfied with the carnage, Kyouya huffed, fixed his skirt and hair, and then took the food to his waiting customers, leaving behind three thoroughly beaten men at his wake. Following that was business as usual where he entertained his customers, playing some games with them, writing a message on Takeshi's omelette rice with ketchup, taking a picture (with Tsuna) and even feeding them (i.e. Tsuna) their desserts. With other customers he was expected to be a bit cutesy and girly, but he knew that it would weird Tsuna out if did so, though the other man seemed to like him in his maid outfit.

It was not long until the three men decided to leave the café, Takeshi laughing about a school project waiting for him and Hayato scolding him that the project was due in a week. Tsuna hung back just enough to send Kyouya a dashing wink and smile before he disappeared after his friends.

Since his shift had ended not long ago (Enma had left before him) Kyouya hurried to the changing room, eager to leave for home. He was tired of wearing the maid costume and the heels were killing his feet. Once in the changing room he quickly divested himself of the costume and removed his wig, placing it on a dummy head that sat on a low dresser on one side of the room. He removed the stockings that encased his legs and, blushing in embarrassment, pulled down the pair of women's underwear he was wearing as well. Considering the underwear, he had no choice but to wear those; unsurprisingly Reborn had taken away his boxers and replaced them with women's underwear and it was either wear them or go commando. Of course, Kyouya would rather be humiliated being found out wearing underwear made for the opposite sex then exposing his family jewels for the whole world to see.

Glad to find his extra pair of boxers in his backpack (that sneaky bastard of an employer), Kyouya slipped them on along with his jeans, shirt, and jacket. He pulled on a fresh pair of socks and then his sneakers, and once he cleaned away the make up from his face, packed away any necessities, and punched out his card he was ready to leave.

"See you on Tuesday, Hibari-kun," Kikyo called as he passed the younger man in the hall, carrying a tray of parfait.

Kyouya only nodded in response as he headed towards the back door. He passed by Reborn's office, where said man was on the phone talking to an associate. The older man waved at him, smirking that evil smirk of his. The younger man narrowed his eyes in a glare and debated whether or not he should flip his boss the finger. In the end, he decided he shouldn't lest he wanted to get fired. So he left the café, tired from a hard day's work and just wanting to get home to rest.

To his surprise, he had a visitor waiting for him outside. Leaning on the wall across the alley was Tsuna, who tore his eyes away from the sky and locked them with Kyouya's wide ones. Smiling, Tsuna approached the younger man and waved a hand in greeting.

"Hi," he said and that one simple word caused elation to flood Kyouya's being.

"Hi," the raven-haired man said back and he was rewarded with a much bigger smile.

"It's getting late," Tsuna said, his eyes full of affection for the man before him. "I'll drive you home, because it's dangerous for a _young lady_ such as yourself to be walking around the city all by your lonesome."

Instead of being offended like he normally would if any other person said that, Kyouya just smiled softly and grasped the hand that was offered to him, a light blush appearing his face as he did so.

"As you wish, goshujin-sama."

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><p><strong>AN:** So, you have fun reading? Because I did not have fun getting beat up by Mr. Awesome Superhuman Skylark. Still, it was worth it all the way because I have so much fun writing it!

Considering the first story, I actually got the kissing scene from a NaruSasu doujinshi I read, where Sasuke was a neko (kawaii!) who was very tsundere for Naruto (double kawaii!). And considering the second story... I admit I have a crossdressing fetish, especially when it involves French maid costumes. Also, I could not _resist_ having Kyouya wear women's underwear. Talk about the shoe being on the other foot... or in this case, the panties being on the other guy who's not Tsuna...

Now, please don't forget to submit your reviews because I'm going to be bitten to death once again (it must've been that women's underwear bit...) and your reviews are probably the only things that will save me... *caught by handcuffs* Here we go again...


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